In light of the recent arrests and attacks on my fellow hookers by Fucktards and Law officials who obviously took the day off from doughnut shopping to arrest working girls. I have compiled a few helpful etiquette tips for men to follow in order to avoid being labeled a "cretin" by my fellow sex workers.

Ever since I started listing my telephone number in my ads I began getting men callers with absolutely NO etiquette what so ever.  And although I appreciate each and every call that comes my way, I really do wish you men would put fourth the basic effort of good manners that was taught to you by your mothers, fathers, and grandmothers.

*So let's get down to business*

First things first- PLEASE do not call us with the intent to talk dirty with us.  We have no desire to sit there and entertain your fantasies over the phone.  If you want to talk dirty over the phone then let me kindly give you my "niteflirt" number so we can have at it.  My time and patience is way too limited for this kind of thing.  Not to mention, it's illegal and a sure fire way to get you arrested, and nothing says un-sexy like those orange jumpsuits, bologna sandwiches, and ink stained fingers.  Catch my drift? Be smart and save all the dirty talking for your 1on1 time with the lady.

Be sure to introduce yourself when you call her, don't just start off by saying "Are you working tonight"?  How rude!  Being as polite as possible on the phone will set the tone for how a hooker will treat you when she meets you.  If you sound like trash over the phone, then be ready to bring garbage bags because she's going to fill it with her trashy attitude.

Keep in mind that a hooker can not disclose her services or rates over the phone with you, so whining and copping attitude won't help your situation.  Before you even consider dialing her number you should have already read her entire site. 

If you call to ask about rates...you haven't read the site. 

If you call to ask about services...you haven't read the site.

If you call to ask about my location...you haven't read the site.

Im aware that reading websites in its entirety is time consuming, but so is creating and maintaining them.

Wanna know what's REALLY time-consuming?  Finding lawyers and having to explain a prostitution arrest to our families.